A Changeling’s Guide to… Seelie Slang

Seelie Slang

As if being stolen by faeries isn’t tough enough, there’s a whole load of new things to learn once you’re in the Seelie Court. Seelie Slang is one of them.

Don’t know your grotsnozzles from your wiffletrots? Don’t let your flucktumble bangboggle you.

Priya Dhawan, Changeling and survival expert, has your back.

Badb’s nostrils Oh dear! / Oh no! / A polite expression of dismay “Badb’s nostrils, that’s not good at all…”
Bangboggled Confused “I have to admit, I’m rather bangboggled with the whole thing.”
Clotswob Clumsy “Milo is such a clotswob.”
Dagda’s dangles Excellent “This party is the Dagda’s dangles!”
Flucktumble A difficult position “I’d like to help, really I would, but I’m in a bit of a flucktumble this week.”
Flumkrat The worst person imaginable “Don’t be a flumweasel.”
Globskite Term of affection for a friend who is being an idiot “I love you, but you can be such a globskite at times.”
Gnarlbucket A difficult and annoying person “Burr’s being a gnarlbucket. As usual.”
Go ride a Kelpie Get lost / go away / I hope something extremely unpleasant happens to you “Nettle Reed can go ride a Kelpie for all I care.”
Grotsnozzle A mean person, usually stuck-up, snooty or of high birth “Leander is such a grotsnozzle.”
Macha’s breath Oh my! / Expression of shock “Macha’s breath! What did you do that for?”
Puck’s bottom Oh dear / oh no / an impolite expression of dismay “You want me to do what?? Oh… Puck’s bottom.”
Puck’s ears / nose My goodness! “Puck’s nose, you’re lazy!”
Sludgesnipe A sneaky or a badly behaved person, usually of low birth “How dare you, you utter sludgesnipe!”
Splunktucker Gosh darn it / Expression of distress “Argh! Splunktucker!”
Wiffle Rubbish / nonsense / chatter “Spindle talks a lot of wiffle most of the time.”
Wiffletrot Someone who talks a lot / chatterbox “I know I can be a bit of a wiffletrot at times…”
Wisplet A daydreamer / someone who is flighty or easily distracted “Oh, Spindle. Why are you such a wisplet? Concentrate!”

So, now you understand what on earth the Seelie are saying, all you have to worry about is finding your way around, or avoiding curses, or not eating Faerie food in case you get trapped there forever, or not running into dangerous creatures (like Kelpies) who want to kill you, or…

Good luck.

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